Three Things That Hurt Your Relationship

3 things that Hurt Your Relationship
Relationships are complicated and have lots of moving parts.  However, there are some simple things we should avoid that can make our relationships more complicated.     Forgetting God’s Goodness We all get caught up in living life and doing things at a fast pace. We move from event to event, from day to day and week to week without thinking about how good God has been to us. We look at our circumstances and if they are not Facebook pretty, or Twitter post ready, we don’t deem the...

Conversation Starters for Lovers

Talking with Your Spouse
There are times that you just need a little help to move your conversation with your husband/wife along. Here are some ideas to use. Who has been your biggest influence in your life and why? What musical instrument would you like to learn to play? What are your pet peeves? What is your favorite vacation memory? If you could pick one super power what would it be? Have I told you today how much I love you?

Your Mouth Is Ruining Your Relationship

Unhappy young woman having argument with man at home
Words are powerful tools that can build strong and powerful positive emotions. Words can move a man to achieve great things. We enter into marriage with two simple words, “I Do”.  However, if we are not careful our careless and unguarded words can create a huge hole in our relationship. In all relationships there are times we don’t communicate well with each other because of the stress of life and busy schedules. In most cases a simple “I’m sorry” can help repair the damage done by our words....

How To Stop The Lying In My Relationship

Relationships are strengthen by the truth and weaken by lies. However, there are two types of lies that I have noticed in my work with couples. The first lie is the one the other person tells you.  This lie is intended to make you feel better or believe in hope that is yet to appear. The lie is told with a distorted view of helping the relationship stay together or to move it in some direction. The ultimate goal of the lie is manipulation. The liar knows what they are doing is wrong, but they a...

Do You Have A Rogue One Relationship?

I am a fan of Star Wars. I saw Episode IV – A New Hope, back in 1977. It was my first movie date with the pretty girl I was dating, Phyllis. I am a big sci-fi fan, and Star Wars was supposed to be the “next big thing” after Star Trek. I was hoping my girlfriend would share my interest in sci-fi. My hopes were quickly dashed when she fell asleep during the movie. I asked God, “How could this be the one for me? What could we have together long term if she fell asleep watching a great sci-fi movie....

Ways To End The Holiday Drama in Your Relationship

The holidays can be like that line from A Tale of Two Cities: "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times." The real question is what holiday stress management techniques can people use to end the holiday drama. There will always be the unexpected drama such as a flat tire or someone dropping the casserole dish. The drama I am talking about is the pettiness, the arguing, and the tense emotions that can stress you out. One of the best ways to end the holiday drama is to have a bala...

Please Put Down The Knife

Put Down The Knife
It is inevitable that there will be some form of conflict in a relationship. Sometimes, the conflict is minor such as forgetting to turn the dishwasher on. Other times it could be more serious like forgetting a birthday or special occasion. The use of the wrong words at the wrong time can be a source of conflict. Our tendency, when in conflict, can sometimes be to pick up a knife. I am using a “knife” as a metaphor for a strong negative reaction we can have during a relationship conflict. I a...

3 Attributes of a Sold Out Marriage

When you talk to successful entrepreneurs, athletes, authors or teachers, there is one common theme to their success, they were sold out. To these “sold out” people there was only one inevitable outcome, reaching the goal. There were a number of challenges along the way. However they didn’t start the journey just to reach challenges and give up, they started the journey to overcome the challenges. Marriage is the same way. We start the journey all starry eyed and excited about the joy befo...

Is Your Relationship Suffering From Election Fatigue?

We have completed one of the most intense and divisive election cycles in a long time. The strain that this has place on our nation and in some cases relationships is unprecedented. Has your marriage suffered from Election Fatigue because of it? Here are three principles to recover and move forward. Pull your relationship out of the election fallout. This country has fallen into a place of me vs you, up vs down, in vs out and my way vs your way. This type of polarized thinking leads t...

What To Do If Your Loved One Cheats

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One of the harsh realities for some relationships is having at some point to deal with a cheating love one. I define cheating as having an emotional or physical or financial affair with someone outside of your relationship. The real question is what will you do when you discover the affair? Will you cry, throw things or will you try not just to get even, but go a couple of steps further than the one who cheated on you? Ok, stop - take a deep breath and let’s figure out a plan where you kee...